If you take a long and somewhat detached look at inner workings of your Self – with a pure curiously and some detachment, how do you ‘work’ best? By yourself, from yourself? With a partner or a trusted friend as a mirror – or within a group of people? Why this is important to know? Our search of our true Identity, Individuality, the Self can take many forms – not all of them direct. Often, we can discover our in-built Modus Operandi by simple and honest self reflection.

Out of these three types of operations we all have the one which is dominant, natural or the one we start out with; but all three are needed for a balanced life. We just need to discover and accept our ‘primary’ mode and trust it in its gifts; use it well but not to the point of abuse or at the expense of the other two.

Each mode has its unique advantages and gifts and not exploring our less natural modes would be a mistake.  The art is – as always – increasing a dynamic balance, working from our inherent, gifted strengths and infinitely exploring and improving other areas.

Here is the video transcript 🙂

“To find our Identity – there are some tricks, and this is something that obviously goes beyond the scope of this call, however – there are some tricks to discover how you best ‘operate’. Some people discover their identity and they better operate by themselves, from themselves, being totally totally a pioneer, a creator and this is their ‘modus operandi’ – this is how they work best. Their identity is just between them and the universe. You’re getting some hints, some insights, some dreams, things coming to you about what you should be doing. So basically it’s God and yourself; it’s a creation and yourself. And then you manifest through this and you tap into your sense of Self only by yourself. Now, this is one situation. Another situation is when somebody operates better when they are a part of a couple – not necessarily this is a marriage couple; it could be a marriage couple, it could be a good friend, it could be a business partner. Their identity is best reflected back to them through this person. And this is a very interesting situation because we all receive some clues and insights but for some people they have to have this other person as a mirror. And very often this is intuitive and people go with it; very often people fight against it – because they believe that they need to come up with something from inside, they need to receive some guidance, but no, for them their path is reflected, their identity and their past is reflected back to them through people – one-to-one collaboration, one-to-one cooperation with people who they meet especially with close contacts. And then seeing them they are almost seeing their reflection as in the mirror. And then there is a situation when people operate best as a part of a bigger whole; you operate the best when you are part of a community. It could be a small community; it could be a big community; but basically anything reaching more than two people is a community – three people it’s already a community; 10 people, 100 people, thousand people – that doesn’t matter. So some people better operate within this ‘brotherhood of men’ so to speak. And this could be a very tricky situation because in this situation – ideally – we are talking about quite an advanced state of consciousness, when you first need to both tap into yourself and figure out who you are and have all this flow of universe coming to you (through insights, dreams, urges and longings), you are unique and your individual and at the same time you need to appreciate and understand and accept that you operate better in this situation when there is a group of people and you’re working together towards the common goal.
So quite possibly – from what you mentioned – the whole situation when you are working for the bigger cause, so you’re working for humanitarian cause and this is very often the situation when we have to be unique but within this part of community. And this is a situation when our purely expression from self or self expression through the mirror with a partner might not work. Why is this is a tricky placement? Because ideally this is how things should be. This is how ancient people first started to cooperate with each other – they lived in communities, they supported each other so they could survive, they could thrive, they could move forward. But also in the future if you think about it the way forward is through cooperation of people; countries and everything. And looking at the news we seem to be very very far from this place… at the same time we can see also the struggle of the collective to come up with some better format for this.”

Best tools I found (and practiced ever since) which work really work for most people to explore Identity, Individuality and cultivate the Self:


Our next FREE Cafe Self Q&A is on the 9th of September 2022; meanwhile, if you have any questions please get in touch using the form below, I’d be delighted to hear from you!

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